If you are beaten by your husband, or the man with whom you live or have a relationship, this handbook can assist you.

It is against the law for your husband or partner to beat you. But there are still many people, including some police, state's attorneys, and judges, who do not believe that violence between a man and woman involved in a relationship is a crime. They may think that it is a private matter between the couple. Some people may even tell you or imply that the violence is your fault.

Remember:

• You are not alone. One-fourth of all relationships include violence, which almost always involves the man beating the woman.
• You are not the cause of someone else's violent behavior!
• You do not deserve to be abused!
• You have the right to expect and demand help and respect!
• You have the right to make your own choices!
• Making a safe home for yourself and your children may be difficult. But you can do it - one step at a time. Legal remedies through the Illinois Domestic Violence Act are available to protect and assist you. Working with helpful and understanding people will make your task much easier. This handbook can help you.

Facts About Domestic Violence

• Every 15 seconds in the U.S., a woman is beaten.
• Domestic violence results in more injuries that require medical attention than rape, accidents and muggings combined.
• Two in five women who are murdered are killed by their husbands. At least 95% of all cases of partner abuse involve a man beating a woman.
• Woman abuse happens in all classes and races. It occurs at every level of income and education.
• Violence in the home usually becomes more frequent and severe over time. The abuser's apologies do not mean that the violence will not occur again.
• Children who grow up in violent homes come to believe that violence is normal. They come to believe that it is an acceptable way to control someone else. The majority of adult violent prisoners were raised in violent homes.
• Violence is often part of a pattern of threats, insults, insane jealousy, explosive temper, and attempts to isolate and overpower the woman.

MYTH: A man's home is his castle. No one should interfere with the family.
REALITY: Battery is a crime! No one has the right to beat another person. It is your home too. You have the right to a life free from fear and physical abuse.

MYTH: A woman who gets beaten brings it upon herself by nagging or provoking her spouse.
REALITY: Women are beaten for reasons as ridiculous as: the dinner was cold; the TV was turned to the wrong channel; the baby was crying. The fact is that abusive men refuse to control their violent impulses. Even where the man may have reason to be angry, he has no right to express his anger violently. You are not responsible for his violent behavior!

MYTH: A woman who stays with her husband or boyfriend after being beaten must like to be beaten.
REALITY: Being beaten hurts and no one likes it. There are many reasons why women remain with abusive men, including their fear of further violence. the financial hardships of leaving, their emotional attachment to their partners and their belief that families should stay together.

MYTH: Calling the police will automatically result in jail and loss of employment for the abuser.
REALITY: Unless the violence is extremely serious. the abuser is unlikely to spend more than a few hours in jail. Studies have shown that arrest is often an effective way to prevent further violence. In addition, police are now required to assist and advise domestic violence victims.